When I have gone into the hospital I have often said to the staff, “I would love to have access to a MIR machine because I would love to know what my brain image would look like, I would love to see what it looks like when I come in, and what it looks like when I am ready to go home, as I feel a shift has happened and things in the brain have been busy.
The brain is an amazing thing and we still don’t know a lot about it. Sure we know more than we did 100 years ago; even 50 years ago, but we are still just scratching the surface. With the help of the MIR/CT machines we are learning more.
We know for example that people with ADD/ADHD have less blood flow in the frontal cortex of the brain, the area that controls impulse, memory, concentration etc. And this knowledge had helped with understanding and treating of this condition. We now know and have proof that people with ADD/ADHD are not lazy, dumb or just “don’t want to do the work.” There is a physiological difference in the brain and we can now see that.
Studies have also had DID folks and non-D.I.D-( actors) people have had their brain scans, the non-DID people got into their roles and pretended to be someone else and their brain image did not change However the brain images of those with DID showed their neuronal patters changed with the different persona. (I will post the info to the studies when I am feeling better
So where does this leave me, and others? Hopefully with a better understanding of this condition and that it’s not something “put on, or something I am doing to get attention” It also helps me understand that there is stuff going on in my brain and this is not a character flaw. I have known that, but when I get in funks like this it reminds me that I will get through this, that I am tired because my brain is working away like crazy and there is a good reason I am tired.
So, I am taking it easy, have pulled away from some much loved activities to take care of my mental health. It’s sad that I need to do this, but it’s what I need to do to take care of myself. It’s also a reminder that I am not “normal”, and can’t expect to be able to be like non D.I.D. people. As much as I love doing things and being part of life, I still have to be very careful of my energy output, and have to have respect for my limitations.Some days it’s easier to accept then others. I guess this is part of learning to be gentle with myself
I guess that’s it for now,
Until next time, be gentle with yourself
Cheers and be well