Back in the early 1950’s there was a TV show called This Is Your Life. An unsuspecting guest would be tricked to come to a location near the studio and would be surprised to learn that they would be the featured guest of this show. They would then be brought into the studio where significant people in this person’s life would come on stage to tell the audience stories about the guest. At the end all the people would gather around the guest and the guest would receive a gift, which was always a scrapbook of memories and a 16mm projector and camera.
Last week I was talking to my son about how I had misplaced my watched. “Your Mickey Mouse watch?” was his reply. I said I never had a Mickey Mouse watch and he said, “Yes you did mom, you use to give it to the kids in the daycare to look at while you changed their diapers.” I have no recollection of any of that.
A few days later I mentioned this to my friend and she said- yes, you had a Mickey Mouse watch. So I guess I must have, but cannot recall any of this. This evening my husband and I were out having dinner for our anniversary (which I did remember)-and we got talking about coverage when you rent a car. He talked about the time I rented a car and the dealer said I had scraped one of the rims of the car. I have a very, very vague memory of that, but not why we had rented the car, what time of year it was, what kind etc. And its not like we rent a car all the time. He also talked about a restaurant by the marina in a town we lived in, I had to ask him where the marina was, he told me, I cannot picture it and have no memory of that either.
These are just a very few of the things I don’t remember, others do, but I don’t and yes I could write a whole book on times like this. It does impact my life, my family and friends and the people I care about.
These are once more examples of how D.I.D. has affected my life. I can only imagine what it must have been like for my son. When I talked to him one time for the C.B.C. radio piece I did on this disorder he told me, “Mom, I thought you lied a lot because you would say you would do one thing, like help me with my homework, or we would go to the beach etc., but it never happened so I learned young not to trust or count on anything you said.”
I guess you can say I am frustrated with this impaired memory. It is getting better as I now have conscious linear memory. I can now remember how I played some of the holes during my gold games, on good days I can remember all of them, on bad days I have trouble remembering them as I play them. People in my life understand this and know if I forget, it’s not because I am ignoring them or have found something more important to do, and for that I am very fortunate.
So, the last few days I have been reminded once again "This is Your Life," I just wish someone would give me a scrapbook of memories to fill in the years of blank.
Those are my thoughts for today
Cheers and be well